The corner of the living room is Bill’s territory. That is well known amongst the housemates in Casa de los Wheezyriders. That is where his toys live, that is where he hides when he’s scared or stalking, and that is generally where he spends most of his chill time. Even when we have visitors and Mommy and Daddy clean the entire rest of the house, Bill still gets his corner and his toys, although the small toys go back in the basket rather than all over the floor.
As you can see from the above photograph, Bill has constructed himself a fortress of solitude. To the North, kitty scratcher barriers with peep holes for proper stalking. To the South, a wall mounted with DVD racks and picture frames to ensure distraction. To the East, Firefly on a widescreen TV for when you really want your humans to not notice you. And to the West, an escape route through the dining room, under a jungle of table and chairs and onto the kitty food corner in the kitchen.
It’s a right proper set up for a cat and he is very pleased with it.
HOWEVER, visitors to the Land of Bill must pay a toll and the longer you stay, the more you pay.
Just slightly North of his kingdom is the biggest bit of open landscape in our house. It’s one of the very few places I lay on the floor to stretch or do crunches or pushups or whathaveyou. And since the gym hurt my back last night (I didn’t do it. The gym did it. This is a very important distinction that has to do with Russian dead lifts or, as Cristian called them “Russian death squats”), I used the Northern kingdom to stretch out my back this morning.
Naturally, Billy came over to investigate only, he assumed I was prostrating myself before the king (No, Buddy, let Mommy stretch!) so he flopped down beside me (Billy, get off my hand) and insisted I pay the toll (Dude, I don’t want to pat you right now! I need to stretch my back!) in generous and never ending head scratchies.
Eventually, I gave in because he’s just so darn cutiefaced! I paid the toll, he was satisfied, and I was allowed to finish my stretch as long as he could sit next to my head and monitor my progress.